This week I have literally felt like I was going insane. Not sure why. Sunday was great. We went to Church and it was good. Then it was back to work. Sometimes work feels like a sucking black hole but I know for a fact my job was provisional. On 10/10/08 I lost my job suddenly due to a layoff and on 10/28/10 (two years ago exactly) I started this new job in the Seattle area. It has been a wild ride. On the way home today I realized something. I was losing the battle. I had given into self pity and depression. Not that depression is weakness but self pity can be. I prayed and took spiritual authority over what I believe to be a demonic attack (no I am not going to go all deliverance ministry but I do believe in the spirit world). I am still a bit freaked out by the Church lingo that goes along with it.
Whatever God is doing with this job, the money situation and my car problems, I need to know He knows what He is doing. Either I believe or I dont. There is no I kind of believe. God does not leave me when I go to work. What does he take a vacation to Saturn and come back on Sunday. What kind of thinking is that.
I still think I may be going insane but that is nothing new.
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