Tired of the fight

This week I have literally felt like I was going insane. Not sure why. Sunday was great. We went to Church and it was good. Then it was back to work. Sometimes work feels like a sucking black hole but I know for a fact my job was provisional. On 10/10/08 I lost my job suddenly due to a layoff and on 10/28/10 (two years ago exactly) I started this new job in the Seattle area. It has been a wild ride. On the way home today I realized something. I was losing the battle. I had given into self pity and depression. Not that depression is weakness but self pity can be. I prayed and took spiritual authority over what I believe to be a demonic attack (no I am not going to go all deliverance ministry but I do believe in the spirit world). I am still a bit freaked out by the Church lingo that goes along with it.

Whatever God is doing with this job, the money situation and my car problems, I need to know He knows what He is doing. Either I believe or I dont. There is no I kind of believe. God does not leave me when I go to work. What does he take a vacation to Saturn and come back on Sunday. What kind of thinking is that.

I still think I may be going insane but that is nothing new.

A Full Circle Journey

Feeling God or Feeling Alone

On Sunday I felt close to God. Not just from going to Church but I felt the spirit. I often experience this when meditating or hanging out in nature on focusing on God. OK a bit mystical. The rest of the week I sometimes feel as if God takes a nap and lets the world go its own way during the week. By the end of the week I feel tired and fried and far from God. I know we are not alone. Not even during the week but feelings are deceiving. Caught up the business it is hard to know He is there sometimes

What have we here?

This is my new blog. I started over. Partly because my former blog got too personal to share with the world. Also too controversial. It turned into a journal of my meltdown of sorts.

I named this a Journey in Circles because I feel like my life goes around in circles and I often circle back to where I started out.

Like my old blog and many others, I will be commenting on things I find interesting, offensive, wonderful or just what happens to be going on in life.

Perhaps I will get some readership again. I may pull in some posts of my old blog for reference as well.

Enjoy